Do you ever wonder how to help your young athlete build confidence?

Maybe you’ve noticed your child gets nervous before games or struggles with self-doubt after a loss. Does she get nervous before games or beat herself up after mistakes? As a sports mom, do you feel helpless watching her struggle with confidence and mental toughness? You’re not alone. Many parents face these challenges, and it’s heartening to know that there are practical solutions to help young athletes thrive mentally and emotionally.

In this episode of the Raising Elite Competitor’s podcast, we explored these very topics. I’m excited to share insights from our community of sports moms who have been through our signature mental training program, the Elite Mental Game. These experienced parents have shared invaluable tips and strategies that are working for their athletes, offering hope and guidance for those navigating similar challenges.

Nervousness Is Normal, But Tools Are Essential

Many young athletes experience nerves before competitions. As one mom, Jennifer, shared, her daughter was so nervous before a lacrosse game that she sat in the car, almost paralyzed with anxiety. They used breathing exercises and visualization techniques to help her calm down and focus. The result? Her daughter went on to score a goal in the game, showing that having tools to manage nerves can be a game-changer.

“It’s very normal for athletes to be nervous before they compete. And I think you all, and we all know that, right? But the issue is that not all athletes actually have tools to handle that nervousness,” Jennifer said. “They then internalize that as bad, like ‘It’s bad for me to feel nervous. I shouldn’t be feeling this, but I don’t know what to do with it’.”

Jennifer’s experience is a powerful reminder of how important it is for athletes to have strategies for managing their emotions. Breathing exercises, visualization, and affirmations can help athletes gain control over their nerves, allowing them to focus on their performance rather than their fears.

The Power of the Snapback Routine

One of the key strategies taught in the Elite Mental Game is the snapback routine, a method for recovering from mistakes quickly. Kristen, a mom of a 13-year-old volleyball player, shared how this technique has transformed her daughter’s approach to the game.

“She is using positive self-talk all the time. Once she really got into the program, she saw how her face and her teammates’ faces and their body language. And she saw the immediate impact it had on what was happening on the court. And she’s become really, I think, a leader in lifting people up out of that space,” Kristen noted.

Kristen also shared how her daughter’s coach pulled her aside and acknowledged her efforts, “Her coach pulled her aside and said, ‘I want you to know, I see the changes you’ve made in your mindset. I can see your demeanor has changed on the court and I want you to hear it from me that I see it.”

By focusing on effort rather than outcome, young athletes can learn to bounce back from mistakes more quickly, maintaining their confidence and composure on the field or court. The snapback routine empowers athletes to address mistakes, learn from them, and move forward without being weighed down by self-doubt.

Creating a Supportive Environment

The role of parents in fostering a positive sports experience cannot be overstated. As Grace, another mom, highlighted, it’s important to provide a supportive environment both on and off the field. She and her husband coach middle school volleyball and noticed their athletes struggling after mistakes.

“We teach 5th through 8th graders. At this age, just like the other mom said they don’t have the tools to know how to shake off a mistake and how to bounce back,” Grace admitted. “So that’s when we started researching more sports psychology and what mental toughness was, and then how do we bring this back not only to our team, but to our own daughters as well.”

By creating a supportive atmosphere where mistakes are seen as learning opportunities, parents and coaches can help athletes develop resilience and a growth mindset.

Be Their Safe Space

As parents, one of the most important things we can do is create a supportive environment at home. Miranda also shared how this has transformed her relationship with her 12-year-old:

“She’s able to find me and dad as a safe place. And so it’s not so exhausting, right? She’s not going to get coached by one more person. She knows that she can come home and puke all the things out and we’re going to be like, ‘Oh man. And how did you handle it?'”

By listening without judgment and avoiding the urge to coach, we give our kids space to process their experiences.

Embracing Personal Growth and Encouraging Teammates

The journey of helping young athletes navigate challenging coaches and team dynamics can be transformative. Angela, a mom whose daughter faced a tough volleyball season, noticed significant changes in her daughter once she began to change her approach.

Angela shared, “I think it changed once. Once I started changing my approach and conversation. I started seeing a little bit like, ‘Why do I have to do this? I’m going to privates twice a week. What are you trying to do to me?’ It was like that attitude I want. I did not want to force her. So that curiosity, I was just trying to pull out curiosity. And I started logging in and working, and she could hear it, and then she’s like, ‘Yes, I gotta go do my part Mom.’ I said, ‘Yeah, that would be great, because we’re partner together’.”

Angela found that the program’s short, manageable sessions helped her daughter reflect on her experiences and change her attitude both in sports and at school. She observed, “I think what I really like about the program is it’s like little snippets, like nine minutes. It doesn’t take a lot, but it just gives them enough to really chew on and think about. And I saw transfers in school like I could literally see her attitude changing in school with her school.”

A breakthrough moment for Angela’s daughter occurred during a challenging volleyball tournament in Nebraska. “We got crane, like Miranda said, we just got murdered, and it was the last game, and most of the time, Claire would not have any idea how to get her mind back into it. And usually she cries and she has a meltdown, and she was the only one that did not have that. So what she did. She went around her teammates and said, and I’m probably going to cry at this. She goes, ‘I believe in you’. I was like, ‘Oh my gosh, she just said that’. And I started crying because I turned away from my husband. I’m like, she just did not say that. I believe in you.”

This powerful moment demonstrated how her daughter’s newfound confidence and leadership skills had taken root. Angela reflected, “It was so good. I would be such a proud mom. Everybody was crying because they lost, but I was crying because my daughter was, like, trying to encourage her class, her mates, like, it’s okay, I believe in you. We got this.”

This story highlights the incredible transformation that can occur when athletes feel supported and empowered. As athletes become more confident in themselves, they naturally begin to uplift and inspire their teammates, creating a positive and resilient team dynamic.

Restoring Joy and Overcoming Burnout

One of the most concerning issues for parents is when their child loses the joy of playing their sport. Miranda’s daughter faced this challenge, expressing a desire to quit after a difficult tournament.

“She has been…She has the same coach that she had last year, but she is very hard…And my kiddo is really pretty good at volleyball. And this year she started to look a little bit different on the court. Second, guess herself…And she’d look instantly at her coach. Coach would give feedback that wasn’t the best, maybe some eye rolling, turning her back or actually yelling at her on the court,” Miranda shared.

By supporting her daughter and encouraging open communication, Miranda helped her daughter find joy in playing again. It’s crucial to balance the demands of competitive sports with opportunities for rest and fun to prevent burnout and keep the love for the game alive.

Help Them Find Balance

Grace’s daughter was feeling burnt out from the demands of a competitive team. Their solution?

“We started rewriting what does your week look like? Because we’re at the gym so many days a week. How do we build in social opportunities with your non volleyball friends? If you’re too tired to do a workout on your off days, okay, take that time to rest.”

Making time for other interests and proper recovery is crucial for sustaining passion long-term.

A Transformative Experience for Athletes and Parents

The Elite Mental Game isn’t just about improving athletic performance; it’s about building a strong foundation for life. Kristen shared how her daughter’s newfound skills have even impacted their relationship.

“And I’m like, ‘Well done’. And so this is, I said this in the chat, but all of this is ultimately about distress tolerance. And that’s for parents and it’s also for kids and it applies everywhere. It works everywhere. And it’s a hundred percent the best thing we’ve ever done,” Kristen emphasized.

By equipping athletes with the tools to manage stress and challenges, parents can foster a supportive environment where their children can thrive both on and off the field. The lessons learned through the Elite Mental Game are applicable beyond sports, helping young athletes develop the confidence and resilience needed to succeed in all areas of life.

Taking the Next Step

If you’re a parent looking to support your young athlete’s confidence and mental toughness, consider exploring resources like the Elite Mental Game. With proven strategies and a supportive community, you can empower your child to face challenges with confidence and resilience.

As Angela concluded, “Focus on the journey, not just the outcome. This is the best thing we’ve ever done for our daughter.”

Whether your child is just starting out in sports or has been competing for years, remember that confidence is built over time with the right tools and support. Let’s continue to create environments where our young athletes can grow, learn, and enjoy the journey of sports. By investing in their mental and emotional

well-being, we set them up for success both on and off the field. Encourage your child to embrace challenges, celebrate their progress, and enjoy every moment of their athletic journey. 

Together, we can help them become confident, resilient, and empowered individuals ready to take on whatever life throws their way. We can do this!

Episode Highlights: 

[00:00] Mental preparation for young athletes with sports moms sharing tips and strategies.

[05:55] Mental toughness training for athletes, parents, and coaches.

[09:21] Mental toughness in youth sports, parents and coaches share experiences and insights.

[15:00] Parenting and sports, with a focus on mindset and relationship changes.

[20:51] Parenting and coaching strategies for volleyball players.

[24:51] Parenting strategies for supporting children in sports.

[29:02] How a mom’s positive attitude and encouragement helped her daughter become a confident leader in volleyball.

[31:50] Parent-led youth sports program for mental toughness.

[36:36] Raising teenage athletes, managing pressure, and dealing with negative influences from parents.

[41:32] Parenting strategies for youth sports, focusing on positive reinforcement and maintaining a positive attitude.

[45:27] Dealing with emotions and failures in sports.

[49:37] Balancing sports and mental well-being for young athletes.

[52:56] Managing stress and anxiety in children through mindset training.

[57:08] Volleyball training program for athletes and parents. Parents reflect on journey with daughters in sports, emphasizing importance of enjoyment and learning.

[1:01:13] Mental preparation for athletes in various sports.

[1:04:17] Helping athletes overcome burnout and confidence issues through coaching and support.

Next Steps:

• Back to School Special is happening NOW on The Elite Mental Game! Use this link to jump in for $400 off the program so your athlete can head into her season without the mental struggles of last season!

• Join our FREE Training for Sports Moms – How to Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game so She Believes in Herself as Much as You Do
• Visit our podcast website for more great episodes

Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission and leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts.