Ever feel like the second you bring up mental training, your daughter shuts down?

You start to say something and she already knows where you’re going, so she tunes out or rolls her eyes. You’re not trying to make her feel like something’s wrong, but you do want her to realize how much working on her mindset could help her game.

If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. So many moms I talk to share the same struggle. They know their daughter’s potential, they see how much her mindset impacts her confidence and performance, but getting her on board? That’s a whole different challenge.

Let’s break down how to bring up mental training in a way that feels natural, non-threatening, and even exciting for her.

Why Mental Training Matters

At The Elite Competitor, we focus on helping girl athletes build confidence and strengthen the mental side of their sport. The truth is, most athletes don’t have these skills. They know how to train physically, but no one ever taught them how to deal with nerves, bounce back from mistakes, or handle comparison and pressure.

That’s why our program, the Elite Mental Game (EMG), exists: to give athletes simple tools they can use every day. And when they do, you see the difference almost immediately.

Take Sheridan, one of our athletes. She admitted that when her mom first signed her up, she wasn’t convinced it would help. But within her first week, she learned a quick “step back routine” to reset after mistakes. She used it in practice and told us, “I felt so much calmer.” Now she sees how it helps her not just in her sport but in her daily life too.

That’s the power of starting small. And that’s also why we’ve designed this process to make it easy for you to bring up mental training without feeling like you’re nagging.

Strategy #1: Show Her That This Is What the Best Athletes Do

Let’s be honest: teens are way more likely to listen to someone they admire than to their parents. You could be saying the exact same thing for months, but when they hear it from a pro athlete or a coach? Suddenly it’s genius.

So why not use that to your advantage?

Point her toward athletes she looks up to. Simone Biles, Serena Williams, Steph Curry – these aren’t just physically strong, they’ve all talked about the importance of their mental game. Many work with sports psychologists, use visualization, or share openly about how they prepare mentally.

If your daughter has a favorite college or pro athlete, search their name with “mindset” or “mental training.” You’ll likely find interviews, TikToks, or short videos where they talk about their mental prep. Hearing it from someone she admires makes the idea of mental training less “mom’s suggestion” and more “that’s what the best do.”

And if you’re not sure where to start, I’ve created a Conversation Guide that includes some podcast episodes where real athletes share how mental training changed their performance. These aren’t “struggling” athletes either, many just wanted a competitive edge. When your daughter hears girls her age talk about how learning these skills helped them win state championships or handle big moments, it starts to click.

Strategy #2: Connect It to Her Goals

Here’s the key: your daughter will be motivated when she sees how something connects to what she wants, not what you want for her.

You might be wishing she had more confidence, or that she didn’t spiral after mistakes. But to her, those aren’t motivating reasons. What matters are her own goals.

Maybe she wants to play at the next level. Maybe she wants to make varsity, be team captain, or just feel free and have fun on the field. Whatever she’s told you about her goals, that’s your entry point.

Once you know her goals, ask curiosity questions:

“What do you think makes the difference between athletes who achieve that and those who don’t?”

“What do you think you’d need to do differently to reach that goal?”

“How do you think top players handle the pressure when the game is on the line?”

You’re not lecturing, you’re reflecting her own goals back to her and helping her think. From there, it’s natural to mention how mindset training can help her reach those goals faster.

Because here’s the truth: at a certain level, everyone is talented. Everyone has worked hard physically. What separates the good from the great is the ability to stay calm, bounce back, and handle pressure. That’s the mental game.

Strategy #3: Start Small with Quick Wins

If it feels like too much work, she’s not going to do it. That’s why quick wins are so important.

Inside the Elite Mental Game, we keep lessons short and engaging, most are 3–15 minutes max. But even before that, there’s a fun way to spark her interest: the “What’s Your Competitor Style?” quiz.

This quiz has just seven questions and gives athletes one of three results:

• The Comeback Player
• The Pressure Player
• The Self-Motivated Grinder

After each question, she gets a short video (like 15–30 seconds) where I connect her answers to mindset training. It’s light, fun, and all about her. She learns about herself while getting little breadcrumbs that show why mental training matters.

When she gets her result, it’s a great chance to ask, “Do you think that fits you? What part of it do you agree with?” Suddenly, you’re having a real conversation about her mindset and it didn’t feel forced.

This quiz is linked in the Conversation Guide, and it’s honestly one of the easiest ways to introduce the idea without making it heavy.

Making It Easier for Both of You

I know it can feel like a battle sometimes. You just want your daughter to realize how much mindset impacts her game, but you don’t want to nag. That’s exactly why we designed EMG to take care of a lot of that “buy-in” for you.

When moms join the program, there’s also a parent track to help you learn how to support your athlete. And once your daughter is inside, we take it from there. A lot of times, hearing it from me or from other athletes lands better than hearing it from you. That’s just how teens are.

So instead of fighting to convince her, you get to sit back a little and let her see the value for herself.

Recap: The Three Strategies

To make this simple, here are the three strategies again:

• Show her that this is what the best athletes do. Share stories and examples from athletes she admires. Let her see that mindset training is what separates the good from the great.
• Connect it to her goals. Instead of making it about what you want, tie mental training to what she wants to achieve in her sport.
• Start small with quick wins. Use tools like the Competitor Style Quiz to spark her curiosity in a fun and non-threatening way.

Final Thoughts

Helping your daughter work on her mental game doesn’t have to mean constant eye rolls or awkward conversations. When you show her that top athletes train their mindset, connect it to her personal goals, and start with small, fun steps, you’ll see her open up.

And once she experiences those quick wins, like Sheridan did with her step back routine, she’ll start to realize this isn’t about fixing her. It’s about helping her play with more confidence, bounce back from mistakes, and enjoy the game she loves.

That’s the real win.

Episode Highlights: 

[00:00:00] Why Mental Training Matters. Most athletes don’t get taught mental skills by their coaches, even though confidence, handling nerves, and bouncing back from mistakes are key to success.

[00:01:30] A Story from Sheridan. One athlete inside the Elite Mental Game admits she was skeptical at first but after using her reset routine, she quickly felt calmer and more in control at practice.

[00:03:00] Strategy #1: Show Her What the Best Athletes Do. Teens listen more when advice comes from athletes they admire. Using examples like Simone Biles, Serena Williams, or Steph Curry helps make mental training feel legit.

[00:06:07] Strategy #2: Connect It to Her Goals. Your daughter is motivated by what she wants, not what you want. Linking mental training to her personal goals (making varsity, having more fun, or being a great teammate) makes the conversation easier.

[00:08:18] Strategy #3: Start Small with Quick Wins. Long lectures won’t work. Instead, give her fast, fun wins like the “What’s Your Competitor Style?” quiz so she learns about herself and sees the benefits of mental training right away.

[00:11:16] Resources to Make It Easier. The Elite Mental Game program is built for athletes and parents, giving quick, practical tools that stick. Plus, the Conversation Guide includes scripts and starters to make talking about mental training way less awkward.

Next Steps:

• Join our FREE Training for Sports Moms – How to Strengthen Your Athlete Daughter’s Mental Game so She Believes in Herself as Much as You Do
• Visit our podcast website for more great episodes
• Grab the Conversation Guide for helping get your athlete on board with mental training

Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission and leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts.