Have you ever felt a little lost when it comes to supporting your daughter through puberty?
It’s a pivotal time in her life, and it can be confusing, especially with all the changes happening both physically and emotionally. You might be wondering how to help her feel confident and love herself as she navigates this journey. Well, you’re not alone. As parents, we’re all looking for ways to guide our daughters through this complex phase, and that’s exactly what today’s conversation is all about.
In this episode, I had the pleasure of chatting with Kimberly Grustas, the founder of Good For You Girls, a skincare brand specifically created for tween girls. Kimberly is passionate about helping girls avoid harmful chemicals and embrace healthy skincare routines. But her mission goes beyond skin-deep – she’s on a journey to help girls cultivate self-love and confidence through puberty and beyond.
The Start of Puberty: It’s Not Just Physical
Many of us might think puberty starts in the reproductive system, but as Kimberly points out, it actually begins in the brain. “Puberty starts in the hypothalamus, the pituitary gland,” she explains, “It doesn’t start in the reproductive glands.” These early changes send signals to the body to begin the process of puberty, which means that the body – and emotions – are reacting to these brain signals even before physical changes become noticeable.
But with puberty happening earlier in girls today than in previous generations, it’s more important than ever to be mindful of the environmental factors that could be influencing their development. According to Kimberly, “The average age of puberty now is 11, but in the 40s, it was 14. That’s a significant change.” Girls are beginning to develop breasts and experience other changes much earlier than their mothers or grandmothers did, and this shift is partly due to the chemicals they are exposed to daily.
The Hidden Dangers of Toxic Chemicals
One of the biggest takeaways from my conversation with Kimberly was the impact of synthetic chemicals found in many personal care products on young girls’ developing bodies. These chemicals, many of which are found in deodorants, lotions, and body washes marketed specifically to girls, can mimic estrogen in the body and lead to earlier puberty.
“These chemicals, whether they’re in junk food or slathered on the skin, are what we call estrogenic chemicals,” Kimberly explains. “They mimic estrogen in the body, which can send false signals and contribute to earlier development.”
Kimberly shared a personal story about how this realization hit home for her. When her daughter excitedly picked up a popular bath set at the store, Kimberly turned the box over to read the ingredients and was appalled. “I was disgusted,” she recalls. “Is this the toxic crap we’re slathering on our daughters?” That moment sparked her mission to create safe, non-toxic skincare products for tween girls.
The consequences of exposure to these chemicals aren’t just short-term. Kimberly stresses that long-term damage can occur, including a greater risk of cancer and disease as these girls grow older. “We also know that the earlier a girl goes into puberty, the greater risk she’s at for cancer and disease as an adult,” she explains. This makes the use of non-toxic products not just a cosmetic choice but a health decision for our daughters.
Skincare as Self-Love: Building Confidence Through Simple Routines
For girls going through puberty, feeling confident in their own skin can be a challenge. Hormonal changes, body odor, and acne are just a few of the new issues they have to navigate. Kimberly emphasizes that teaching girls about proper skincare from an early age can help them take ownership of their health and appearance, boosting their self-esteem.
Her approach is simple but effective: “Girls don’t need 20 products,” she says. Good For You Girls focuses on a straightforward three-step system: cleanse, tone, and moisturize. “Our products are botanical-based, gentle, and designed to support the skin’s natural pH balance without disrupting its microbiome,” she explains.
The skincare line avoids harsh chemicals like alcohol, synthetic fragrances, and dyes, instead using nourishing ingredients like rosehip and flax essential fatty acids. “Young skin doesn’t need chemical exfoliants or scrubs,” Kimberly emphasizes. “Their skin is already perfect – it’s what we all want!”
This simplified approach to skincare not only protects their developing skin but also instills a sense of independence and confidence in young girls. By teaching them to care for their skin early on, we’re helping them build habits of self-care and self-love that can last a lifetime.
Puberty Trauma: Understanding the Emotional Impact
Puberty isn’t just about physical changes, it’s also a time of significant emotional and psychological shifts. Kimberly refers to the concept of “puberty trauma,” explaining that many girls feel overwhelmed by the changes in their bodies and often don’t have the emotional tools to cope with it.
“I think every woman almost remembers their first [period], like, when they had their first; where they were, what they were doing,” Kimberly says, highlighting how significant and often startling these experiences can be. She points out that it’s one thing for a girl to experience these changes at 11 or 12, but quite another for girls who are developing earlier, as young as 8 or 9. “There’s a huge difference mentally with a 9-year-old and an 11-year-old, or a 14-year-old,” she explains. “They are not equipped emotionally to handle these changes.”
This emotional turmoil can manifest as mood swings, irritability, or even acting out, which can be difficult for parents to navigate. But Kimberly reminds us that this is when our daughters need us the most. “In psychology, we have all the data that says when a child is lashing out, that’s the time where you hug them closer. You hug them tighter. You don’t push them away,” she says. “They’re testing you as a parent to see if they can trust you, to see if you’re safe.”
She offers a valuable piece of advice for handling those emotionally charged moments: develop a “safe word” with your daughter. Kimberly’s own daughter would use the word “pickle” when she felt overwhelmed and couldn’t express what was wrong. This allowed her to release her emotions in a safe way, without feeling judged. It’s a simple yet powerful way to create a safe space for your daughter to express what she’s feeling, even when she can’t find the words.
The Importance of Empathy and Open Communication
As parents, it’s easy to focus on the physical aspects of puberty – managing body odor, acne, and menstruation. But Kimberly encourages us to look deeper and remember the emotional toll this time can take on our daughters. “Puberty is a superpower,” she says. “If girls really understood how fascinating and fabulous their bodies are, it would be a game changer.”
Empathy is key. By remembering our own experiences with puberty and sharing them with our daughters, we can create an environment where they feel safe to talk about what they’re going through. Kimberly stresses the importance of validating their feelings, rather than dismissing them. “Don’t tell them to just be positive or change their attitude,” she warns. “If they feel like they can’t come to you, they’ll stop trying.”
By staying open, available, and non-judgmental, we can help our daughters see that the changes they’re experiencing are not something to be feared, but something to be embraced. Puberty doesn’t have to be a traumatic experience – it can be a time of empowerment and growth, if we support them in the right way.
Puberty as a Time of Transformation and Growth
Puberty is more than just a series of changes – it’s a transformation. As Kimberly so beautifully put it: Puberty is a superpower. It’s a time when our daughters are learning to love and care for their bodies in new ways, and as parents, it’s our job to guide them through this journey with empathy, love, and understanding.
By being mindful of the products they use, encouraging healthy routines, and fostering open communication, we can help our daughters navigate puberty with confidence and self-love. Kimberly’s mission with Good for You Girls is about more than just skincare – it’s about empowering girls to feel good in their own skin, during puberty and beyond.
Let’s embrace this journey with them, celebrate their bodies for the amazing things they can do, and help them see that they are truly incredible, inside and out.
Episode Highlights:
[00:00] Introduction to the Podcast and Guest. A discussion on encouraging self-love during puberty and introduces Kimberly Grustas, founder of Good For You Girls, highlighting the significance of non-toxic skincare for young girls.
[03:01] Welcoming Kimberly. Kimberly shares her excitement for the conversation and discusses how misinformation often surrounds puberty and how her personal experiences shaped her journey.
[04:01] Kimberly’s Background and Career. Kimberly talks about her career as a creative director, her passion for nutrition and sport, and how her journey in the natural product movement led her to create Good For You Girls.
[06:39] The Turning Point: A Shocking Discovery, Kimberly recounts a pivotal moment when her daughter asked for a Hannah Montana bath set, and she realized the harmful ingredients inside – sparking her commitment to creating non-toxic skincare for tweens.
[08:16] Launching Good For You Girls. Kimberly explains how she was the first in the U.S. to create a clean skincare line for tweens in 2008, discussing the passion and dedication she’s had for this demographic for over 15 years.
[09:22] The Difference Between Baby and Tween Products. Kimberly highlights the discrepancy between gentle baby products and the harmful, chemical-laden products marketed to tweens and teens.
[11:00] Puberty’s Shifting Timeline. Kimberly discusses the significant drop in the average age of puberty – from 14 to 11 – and the importance of recognizing these shifts while protecting girls from harmful chemicals.
[13:41] The Long-Term Impact of Chemicals. Kimberly explains the link between early puberty and increased risk of cancer and other diseases, emphasizing why it’s crucial to be aware of what we put on our daughters’ skin.
[15:02] How Hormones Affect the Body During Puberty. Kimberly delves into how puberty hormones help growth, and how harmful chemicals mimic estrogen, affecting development in both boys and girls.
[17:00] Puberty Trauma: The Emotional Rollercoaster. Kimberly introduces the concept of “puberty trauma,” discussing the psychological impact of girls developing at younger ages and how parents can empathize and support them through the changes.
[18:30] The Power of Empathy and Safe Communication. Kimberly offers tips on creating a safe, empathetic environment for daughters, including using safe words like “pickle” to help them express overwhelming emotions.
[22:00] Recognizing Early Signs of Puberty. Kimberly explains how body odor, acne, and other signs can signal early puberty, and the importance of detoxing from stress and environmental toxins.
[24:36] Athlete Considerations: Hydration and Skin Issues. Kimberly highlights how dehydration and stress from sports can affect skin health, and the importance of staying hydrated and mindful of skincare.
[25:00] The Good For You Girls Skincare Line. Kimberly shares the philosophy behind her skincare line, focusing on a three-step regimen of cleansing, toning, and moisturizing without harsh chemicals.
[29:00] Deodorant and Probiotic Technology. Kimberly introduces her natural deodorant for tweens, explaining how the probiotic technology helps eliminate odor-causing bacteria without harmful ingredients.
[30:00] Avoiding Harsh Chemicals in Traditional Skincare. Kimberly lists the common harmful chemicals found in traditional skincare products and highlights the importance of gentle, non-toxic alternatives for tweens.
[35:50] Consumer Education and Taking Control. Kimberly stresses the importance of educating consumers and empowering parents to make informed choices about skincare products for their children.
[36:55] A Call to Moms: Reclaiming Self-Care. Kimberly encourages moms to prioritize their own self-care, setting an example for their daughters and creating bonding opportunities around health and wellness.
[38:00] Closing: Special Discount for Listeners. Kimberly offers a special discount code for listeners to try Good For You Girls products and take the first step toward safe, effective skincare for their daughters.
Next Steps:
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