#152: Building Confidence in Your Middle School Girl w/ Katie, Becky, & Allie, Founders of Bloomfully

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Are you navigating the exciting, yet sometimes, tricky journey of raising a middle school girl? If you are, I’ve got something special for you today. I’m thrilled to introduce you to three amazing women –Katie, Becky, and Allie, the heart and soul behind “I Believe In Me.”

These three incredible moms have a total of 17 children between them, and they’ve been empowering girls for over 30 years, helping them strengthen their confidence and discover their true potential. Through their company, “I Believe In Me,” they promote self-motivation, resilience, and personal growth using real-life strategies and tools.

Their focus is on middle school girls – the age when self-confidence can sometimes waver and self-discovery begins. With their inspiring garden theme, they’ve created a nurturing environment to help girls bloom fully into their best selves.

So, here’s the question: How can you build confidence in your middle school girl and support her during this crucial phase of her life? Join us on this journey as we dive into the amazing work of “I Believe In Me” and uncover practical ways to empower your daughter!

What are tweens struggling with right now?

As I sat down with Katie, Becky, and Allie from “I Believe In Me,” we dove into a question that’s been on my mind lately – what are tweens struggling with right now? And let me tell you, their insights were eye-opening!


From their perspective as moms and experienced mentors, they noticed that tweens today have to deal with so many distractions. You know, all those devices and social media that can quickly steer them away from their goals and leave them feeling unfocused and kind of lost. But, these amazing ladies have a super smart solution – they encourage the girls to create daily routines they call “roots.” These routines act like anchors, helping them remain focused and move forward, even when life throws unexpected stuff at them.

The pressure to be perfect.

Another big issue for these young girls is the pressure to be perfect. They tend to compare themselves to others and set really high standards, which can really bring them down when they can’t meet them. But, Katie, Becky, and Allie would like to remind these tweens that it’s not about being perfect – it’s about making progress. They tell girls to embrace every step of their journey, no matter how small, and to celebrate every bit of growth. Just like climbing a mountain, you know? Take it one step at a time.

The impact of social media.

Next, they talk about the impact of social media. It can be really difficult for these young girls. But, these fantastic mentors help them understand that what they see online might not be real life, and it’s super important for them to accept and appreciate who they really are. By recognizing their unique strengths and working hard to improve, these tweens can totally shine and become the best versions of themselves.

How can we build confidence in our tweens?

To build confidence in your tweens, here are some valuable insights from Katie, Becky, and Allie:

Emphasize the Four C’s.

Teach tweens the importance of the four C’s – don’t compare, don’t criticize, don’t complain, and don’t compete. Encourage them to focus on their own growth and progress, rather than comparing themselves to others. Remind them that each person’s journey is unique, and that they should focus on their own development and improvement, not on outdoing others. By adopting this mindset, they can build a strong sense of self and confidence in their abilities, unshaken by the opinions or achievements of others.

Lead by example.

As parents, you have a very important role in shaping your tweens’ confidence. You must demonstrate unwavering support, genuine positivity, and abundant encouragement. Avoid imposing unnecessary pressure on them; instead, celebrate their unique strengths and accomplishments. By being their biggest cheerleaders, we create a nurturing environment that cultivates self-belief and self-worth. Show them that you believe in their capabilities, and they will learn to believe in themselves. By being a positive role model, you can lay a strong foundation for their self-confidence and allow them to tackle challenges with resilience and determination.

Provide ‘fertilizing’ compliments.

After competitions or games, replace critiques for uplifting compliments and constructive feedback. By creating an environment where positive reinforcement is at the forefront, you can help them feel supported and loved, which can help them nurture a healthy and confident mindset. Genuine praise and appreciation for their efforts also foster a sense of worthiness, encouraging them to embrace their achievements and feel confident in their abilities. Moreover, this positive reinforcement can boost their motivation to continue working hard and improving, knowing that their efforts are recognized and valued.

Foster their joy and passion.

It’s important that you observe and encourage your tween’s passions and joys. By supporting them in pursuing activities that they love, you can also foster a strong sense of self and purpose. Remind them that it’s okay to explore new interests and paths in life. Encourage them to be curious and open-minded, and to embrace new challenges with enthusiasm. This willingness to explore and adapt can lead to self-discovery and a deeper understanding of their strengths and passions, which can ultimately help build their confidence as they grow into their authentic selves.

Embrace Setbacks.

When tweens face challenges or ‘failures’, help them view these experiences as an opportunity to grow. Remind them that setbacks aren’t roadblocks but are stepping stones to help them become who they’re really supposed to be. Encourage resilience and determination in facing adversity, and remind them that overcoming these challenges can provide them with invaluable lessons and personal development. Shift their mindset to embrace the journey rather than focusing solely on the destination. As parents, providing unwavering support during tough times reinforces their belief in their ability to overcome obstacles and emerge stronger and more confident than ever.

The Bottom Line

Building confidence in your middle school girl is an amazing journey that has its ups and downs – it requires patience, understanding, and unwavering support. Thanks to the incredible insights from Katie, Becky, and Allie of “I Believe In Me,” we’ve learned powerful strategies to empower our tweens. By emphasizing the four C’s, leading by example, providing nurturing compliments, fostering their joy and passion, embracing setbacks, and shifting perspectives, we can help our daughters blossom into strong, confident individuals.

Let’s support them wholeheartedly as they discover their true potential and believe in themselves throughout this transformative phase of their lives. Together, we can help them grow into their best selves, ready to conquer any challenge that comes their way!

Episode Highlights  

[03:18] The importance of building confidence and building confidence in middle school girls.

[07:42] How to check in with yourself and your heart.

[10:10] What are tweens struggling with right now?

[14:30] How can we build confidence in our tweens?

[18:40] There’s always a chance to grow no matter what.

[20:39] The importance of complimenting your kids.

[28:08] Support them through their failures, even if they’re not really failures.

[32:29] What’s your program for middle schoolers?


Helpful Links:

  • Come hang out with Becky, Katie, and Allie on social @ibelieveinmegirlsand learn more about working with them!

Thanks for joining us on our mission to raise up a generation of confident young women. The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you – we appreciate you!

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